


greek tragedy

by miniaturetigers



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, M/M, and he's lost contact with josh, because josh is fucking sad man wtf, i'm always a slut for angst joshler, tyler is on his honeymoon with jenna
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-26 10:40:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6235384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miniaturetigers/pseuds/miniaturetigers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>josh cursed at himself for never telling tyler about the feelings that burned holes inside of him, the feelings that made the words get caught in his throat, the desperate want and need for tyler to kiss his neck and hold his hands above his head while fucking him slowly into the mattress of a shared motel room.</p>
            </blockquote>





	greek tragedy

**Author's Note:**

> thank you lovely, beautiful little flowers that commented on my first work and left me kudos! that honestly means so much, i mean, it was pretty bad due to it being so rushed before the words slipped my mind. i'm still a sad little nymphet and this is also vent writing. and damn let me say that i relate on the last part so much i almost cried.

   "tyler? sweetheart?" jenna's soft voice echoed slightly throughout the kitchen of the hotel suite they had been staying in. 

 

   tyler was too lost in thought to realize that she now stood beside him, one of her arms lazily wrapped around his bare shoulders. she looked stunningly beautiful, like a field full of pink tulips, or bright, yellow sunflowers. the way her blonde hair fell so gracefully down her shoulders, it took tyler's breath away with just a glimpse. it wasn't the kind of stunningly beautiful that tyler had trouble describing, he could perfectly relate her beauty to gardens full of blossoming flowers, buzzing bees, and children having ice cream on a hot summer day, but holy hell was jenna a sight for sore eyes; and also one of the sweetest girls that tyler had ever met in his entire lifetime, as beautiful on the inside as she is outside. 

 

   "you alright there, cowboy?" giggled jenna sweetly, worry and concern contaminating her gem-like eyes. 

 

   he cleared his throat before turning to face her, his hands hugging her waist. "y-yeah it's just... josh. y'know?" he whispered. lately, it was always josh (apart from jenna who is, like, the love of his life, obviously).

 

   jenna sighed and dragged her sweet tyler to the couch, sitting him down and straddling his waist with her toned legs. "what about him? is he okay?" 

 

   "that's the thing, love. i don't, uh, know." his eyes drooped with sadness and a stressed out sigh escaped his lips. jenna absolutely hated seeing tyler so upset, it was like slowly being stabbed with a knife over and over and over again. 

 

   in the midst of it all, jenna found her way to tyler's neck and began to kiss the certain spot she knew got him going. after all, what else could jenna do? if josh was the one not answering the calls, texts, tweets, and whatever the boys would use to communicate, what good was she? sure, to a certain extent, jenna was worried out of her mind about what the hell was going on with josh, but the person in front of her at the moment was tyler and she needed to help him in whatever way. 

 

 

 

|-/

 

 

 

   everything was blurred together in a big mess of colours and voices and bottles of booze. josh took another swig from the bottle of tequila, sighing as the bitter liquid burned down his throat and tickled his tummy, but it was much better than the pain in his heart. someone was yelling at someone else to help josh up and get in the shower, and someone else was complaining about the horrible stench of alcohol, and someone else was complaining about josh's relapse. but oh josh honestly couldn't care less. better yet, josh wish he  _could_ care less, about every-fucking-thing. he wished he could care less how jenna looked as she walked down the aisle towards tyler and how much josh wished he could have been in her place at the moment, and he wished he could care less about the stupid, sweet smell of cotton candy that reminds him of tyler, and josh just wished he could care less about tyler in general.

 

   but josh knew that he would never forget about the beautiful angel creature from out of this damned galaxy that is tyler robert joseph. how in the world was he suppose to forget something as perfectly imperfect as that bloody man? impossible, that's what he thought about the whole fucking idea.

 

   "josh!" a female voice snapped at him, taking away the bottle of tequila from the completely lost josh. a little giggle escaped his alcohol soaked lips the minute he looked into debby's eyes. "oh, josh. what's gotten in to you?" she whispered in a voice so sad it could make babies cry.

 

   "that... that beautiful monster of a man!" josh slurred angrily. he struggled to get up and was surprised when brendon rushed to his side, wrapping an arm around his waist. 

 

   before josh could make some sarcastic remark at brendon, he was taken away by pete and patrick and they led him to his bathroom, as if josh didn't know the way himself. 

 

   "y'all are the cutest ever." he giggled. pete gave a sly smirk and patrick's cheeks were about as red as a tomato. josh continued to giggle as he stripped himself completely of his clothes, throwing it to the side before stepping in to the shower and trying his best to open the cold water faucet. after a few embarrassingly silly failed attempts, brendon walked in decided to go on and wash josh himself. 

 

   patrick and pete exited the bathroom, closing the door behind them, so that the two would be left alone. 

 

   "boy are you a mess." chuckled brendon as he squirted a bit of shampoo in his hand and continued to washing his friend's faded blue hair. josh didn't reply. "why are you doing this to yourself, josh? you know that we all love you, and tyler loves you t-"

 

   "beebo." he hiccuped in the most childish way possible. "you talk waay to much. shush and wash my hair, please." 

 

   brendon knew he should shut up, for once in his talkative life, and simply went back to cleaning josh. 

 

   josh, on the other hand, couldn't stay quiet. the thoughts in his mind were much too loud and no matter what josh tried to sing in his head, they continued to poke at him like one hundred little pocket knives. he couldn't help but think that tyler was fucking and loving and bathing jenna instead of him, josh couldn't help but wonder if tyler had got jenna any cute surprise gifts, or if he had written her a song and sang it to her in the beauty of the moonlight. josh cursed at himself for never telling tyler about the feelings that burned holes inside of him, the feelings that made the words get caught in his throat, the desperate want and need for tyler to kiss his neck and hold his hands above his head while fucking him slowly into the mattress of a shared motel room. josh wished he had told tyler much before he met jenna.

 

   but it was much too late now, the poor man was convinced that any chance he ever had to tell tyler was now nonexistent. his poor life was over, the soul inside of him completely shattered (josh was a bit of a dramatic) and it was all because of a pretty boy with crooked teeth and eyes that held galaxies inside of them. it was all because of his fear of rejection and tyler hating him and being completely disgusted with the gooey words that were all mushed together in josh's messy mind.

 

   it was all because of love. love love love. what a beautifully disastrous thing it is. love can build you up like a skyscraper and make you feel like a bird soaring high in the beautiful, baby blue sky, and it can tear you down and rip your body to shreds, completely destroying you.

 

   "hey, honey?" debby's voice snapped josh out of his thoughts and brought him back to reality. cold, cruel reality. he was now tucked in his bed in a fresh pair of grey sweatpants and some white muscle tee. "get some rest, okay? please." she kissed his forehead and seemed to float off like a fluffy cloud slowly moving through the sky. josh was beginning to question his sanity at that moment.

 

(heads up! this is the major mention of alcohol abuse and a kind of meltdown so if that could upset you please don't keep on reading, i know joshler is beautiful, but your mental health and security is much more beautiful and important, pal-o.)

 

   that seemed to be the exact opposite of what josh did. once he was sure that everyone had left his apartment, the tired josh crawled out of bed and towards his closet to the secret stash of alcohol that was hidden under the huge pile of his black, skinny jeans. his eyes widened at the sight of bottle after bottle, the sight of sweet venom. a shaky hand reached out to the first bottle of whiskey, his fingers fumbling around to open the cap. 

 

   something inside of josh, deep inside, was screaming at him to stop what he was doing. it screamed and begged and fought, telling josh that everything would be so much better in the morning when he was sober and not crying anymore and can go out with his friends without feeling so hungover that it hurts every bone in his body. this thing reminded josh of how well he was doing with the progress of drinking less, of how well josh was doing in general compared to a few years ago. but it was too late, the bottle was open and the hot, bittersweet liquid now streamed down josh's burning throat. 

 

   "one to forget, another to ignore, another to feel better, another to completely destroy my emotions..." josh continued to mumble out this nonsense between each long swig from the bottle and soon enough, he finished. without second thought he grabbed another bottle and struggled to open it before continuing to drink and drink and drink and drink as though it was the only thing keeping him grounded on the earth. 

 

   flashing images of tyler's smile invaded the intoxicated josh's brain, along with the sweet voice of the brunet. and it hurt like hell, it hurt so much that josh swore he could just shrivel up and die in that very instant. it hurt because josh knew he would never be able to kiss tyler's neck, or hold his hand in public, or tell him how the sunset reminds him of tyler and how at the beginning of each day his immediate thought is tyler and that he's basically still alive because of that stupid man. it hurt because josh wanted to walk down the aisle with his cheeks as pink as roses and his heart racing like the blood that rushed through his veins, but the minute he met tyler's eyes he knew everything would be alright because he would be with the person he's only ever loved. really, truly loved. it hurt because josh... josh loved tyler. josh loved tyler. and that's why it hurt. 

 

   what hurt the most was all of the shit josh had done to himself because of it. he had gotten the beautiful tattoo of a sunset to remind him that in the time of being completely lost and done with life itself, he met tyler. he met tyler and stayed up late talking with him on the phone and listening to tyler make poetry about the sunset and the nighttime and demons that crawl in your ears but that josh made it okay. it hurt because there would always be something in josh's head that convinced him that tyler felt the same way about him. josh hated that.

 


End file.
